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Patricia Johns

~ Bestselling author

Patricia Johns

Tag Archives: christian author

Lurking in book stores…

22 Wednesday Apr 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

american romance author, book on the shelves, book release, christian author, clean author, harlequin author, inspirational author, love inspired author, sweet author

Being a real, flesh and blood author is incredibly awkward. Being an online author–chatting, posting pictures, that sort of thing–is much easier. In real life, I just tend to get awkward.

Yesterday, I decided to go find my book in an actual store. It’s very exciting, but I feel a bit shy when I go out on a mission to find my book. So I slip into stores trying not to be noticed, and I’m SURE plain clothes security guards have their spidy senses tingling at the sight of me. I’m a lurker. I sidle up to the Harlequin shelf, looking for mine…

The first store didn’t have any of mine left–yay!! So I had to go to a different store across town, where I found my book on the shelf, snapped a photo, then slipped away.

DSC03914Because what would I say to someone? “Hey, I wrote this!” And then they say…. What, exactly? “Good for you!” or “That’s great.” And I say…. ??

I don’t know the response for that.

You see? Very uncomfortable. Kind of weird. I have no idea how that conversation would go. So I lurk. I sidle. I snap selfies. I run away.

If YOU’D like to lurk in a store and sidle up to my book on a bookshelf, now is your chance to do it! It’s in the stores–and you won’t look as weird as I do, because you’d just buy it all naturally, looking all normal and unruffled.

If anyone asked you about it, you could just say, “Yeah, I’m buying this,” and they’d say, “Do you want a bag with that?”

See? Normal. Not awkward at all. Don’t take that for granted! πŸ˜‰

 

 

Less than sportsmanlike…

09 Monday Mar 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Alberta Spring, Canadian spring, checker board, christian author, harlequin author, inspirational author, love inspired author, stalemate

Do you see that rainy misery outside? That’s called writing paradise! You wish you could be so lucky as to look out a window over that melting pile of dirty snow IN MARCH! I’m in northern Canada, and there are places in the United States that are hip deep in snow right now. I don’t get to feel smug often about weather, so allow me this. πŸ˜‰

DSC03743

Anyway, this would be writing paradise if I didn’t have my six-year-old at home with a tummy bug. So instead of pouring it on for my deadline, I’m making soft porridge and playing checkers with him.

The only problem is that he no longer trusts me to let him win.

Our first game of checkers, the game ended with me having three kings… which inspired me to sing “We Three Kings” heartily while I wiped the board with him.

“Good game, sweetheart.”

Maybe not really sportsmanlike on my part. Sorry. 😦

The next game, I felt bad for my earlier enthusiasm, and kept giving him chances to jump me.

“No!” he’d say. “If I jump you there, then you’ll jump me back!”

So we kept moving our pieces, him scared to jump me, and me trying really hard not to win again… And we ended up like this:

DSC03742

No joke! The mother of all stalemates.

Parenting at it’s finest. πŸ˜‰ Now you have two things to envy me for: a pile of melting, dirty snow, and my solid parenting strategies.

Happy Monday!

The weight of a heart: writing bad guys

07 Saturday Mar 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

christian author, clean romance, heart and home, inspirational author, love inspired author, love inspired books, sweet romance, wholesome romance, writing a bad guy

Bad guys are definitely fun to write, and my current work in progress has a doozy of a bad guy. Now, romance novels don’t always need bad guys to keep them moving, the focus on the relationship being enough, and this guy developed almost by accident. I needed my cop hero and the journalist heroine to have something to work on together, and in he stepped.

Now, fictional bad guys are much like real life bad guys in that they have two vastly different sides to their characters. If you think about it, even Hitler, who is arguably the most evil man we know of, had a personable side. I’ve read articles where people who worked as bodyguards to Hitler said he was fun and laughed and joked with them. They honestly liked him. The other side to his personality was horrifically cruel–all bundled up into the same person.

In writing, maximizing that dichotomy of character is key in showing just how “bad” a bad guy is: the warm smile right after a vicious sneer, for example, or the extra-kindness before doing something particularly cruel. Abusive people, in real life, tend to show this same kind of flip-flopping behavior, keeping their victims off balance with volleying kindness and cruelty. It’s the inconsistency that makes us nervous. It’s that inconsistency that makes them dangerous.

 

imagesKathy-happy-and...

People are often described as having “a good heart.” Hearts seem to be weighed differently than actions by the people closest to them. Motives are taken into consideration. “He didn’t mean it. He was upset because…” or “She only lied because she was trying to protect him…” In these situations, bad behavior is mitigated by “the good heart,” or the motivation. When actions become intolerably cruel, however, actions weigh more than hearts, and flawed characters become villains. That’s the realm of “bad guys.”

But never fear–I’m a firm believer in that happy ending, and the bad guy meets a suitable end. πŸ˜‰ Also… someone gets married, but sssh… I don’t want to ruin it!

…then you give him a badge and a gun…

05 Thursday Mar 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

christian author, cops take down, harleqin author, inspirational author, love inspired author, police research, writing research

Today, I got to meet a police officer (who is so much fun, that I’d make her my new friend if it wouldn’t seem oddly suspicious…) and toured the police station, as well as a police cruiser. I had a fabulous time!

First of all, I got to get a mental image of how all the parts and pieces go together. Cops episodes just don’t do that for you, and if you watch enough of them in a row, you get a real appreciation for how much it would hurt to be taken down and hand-cuffed. That does not look comfortable! I’m not ashamed to say that I would cry. (I’d also take my hands out of my pockets when asked, for the record.) πŸ˜‰

That’s not the point here, though. My contact with the police has always been friendly. I’ve never even been pulled over before. My six-year-old likes to make conversation with the cops running speed traps when we go for walks, and they are really kind to him. They’ll stop and chat, answer his questions, listen to him tell about his day at school. I like the local law enforcement to recognize us–and our town is small enough that it’s actually possible.

Anyway, this wasn’t a Cops episode or a speed trap conversation, this was a tour of an actual, working police station. I got to peek into holding cells, learn a few scanner codes and sit in the driver’s seat of a police car.

And do you know why? Besides research for this current book I signed a contract for, I’d like to pitch a cop series to my editor (I’ve already received a warm reception on the idea) and I need to make sure I have my details straight. There is just something about a hero in uniform, you know? Strong, protective, sweet, maybe a bit of a wounded past… then you give him a gun and a badge, and it’s a winning combination!

My internal life is WAY more interesting…

02 Monday Mar 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

christian author, christian harlequin author, harlequin author, inspirational author, love inspired author, Love Inspired romance, mashed potatoes

I don’t know what it is about writing a first draft, but it makes me hungry! It must use up some vital store of vitamins or something, because after a week of hard writing, this weekend I ate… and ate.

I was so hungry, that I was tempted to just eat sugar by the spoonful. Relax–I didn’t do it. I don’t want to rot my teeth out or get diabetes. But that’s some serious hunger, which was satisfied with a massive chicken dinner, heaps and heaps of mashed potatoes (which is the diabetic’s equivalent of a bowlful of sugar) and half a package of cookies.

Photo by Jon Sullivan

Photo by Jon Sullivan

And that is all the news I have to report! Your local romance author has eaten her own weight in mashed potatoes and gravy.

This is what you get from me at this point in book writing. There is all sorts of drama happening in my book, but I can’t tell you what’s happening with my characters without spoiling the plot for you, so you are stuck with the actual happenings of this author’s life. Which doesn’t amount to much when I hunker down in front of my keyboard all day.

Sorry about that. :/

But if you get seriously hungry at some point, may I suggest some mashed potatoes?

All About that Bass

15 Sunday Feb 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

all about that bass, christian author, Christian romance, clean romance, harlequin author, inspirational author, love inspired author, sweet romance

Valentine’s Day is over, the pressure is off, and the chocolate is on sale!

With that in mind, I feel it my duty to remind you of a few simple facts:

1. You’re gorgeous! When you walk down the street, there are people who look twice and think, Wow!

2. Your heart is your most beautiful feature–no matter who you are. Kindness is prettier than snark.

3. I like you. ❀

So I bring you the smooth jazz version of All About that Bass… to be watched while munching on chocolate. πŸ˜‰ This just puts me in a good mood!

 

Putting down my Jane Hancock

08 Sunday Feb 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

christian author, contract signing, harlequin author, inspirational author, koala brothers, love inspired author

As you know, A SECOND CHANCE AT FOREVER was accepted for publication by Love Inspired Harlequin. This is really exciting for me. Seriously, contracts never get old!

So here I am on the auspicious day… a picture taken by my six-year-old who asked, “How come you’re putting on makeup?” as if it were the rarest thing he’s seen in his young life. It might be, and it was only lip gloss.

DSC03507

And this is the main event:

DSC03497

The contract is signed with my trusty old Bic pen, and I’m locked into a delightful agreement where I will finish writing the book within six weeks and deliver it to my editor.

The above goofy look on my face? That’s what Happy Author looks like!

PS. My son wanted me to include his photography skills, taking pictures of his Koala Brothers plane set. So here is his contribution of the day, besides taking a picture of his mom. πŸ™‚

DSC03525

You can’t un-see it

06 Friday Feb 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

christian author, harlequin author, inspiratational author, love inspired author, phil 4:8, whatever is pure

I’m a person without a filter. Most people can watch the news and feel a bit of a personal distance from the tragedies, but I can’t. My solution has been to stop watching the news. It might sound shallow, but I’ll surf the Yahoo news for pleasant stories and celebrity gossip. It’s about all my poor heartstrings can handle.

I recently came across an article that said that we should be careful about what we allow into our minds. Violent images actually change us when we see them, and after seeing enough of these horrors, we actually have a lower ability to feel sympathy for the victims. And there is no un-seeing it. You have to live with that image in your mind for the rest of your life. One click of the mouse, and you are stuck with it forever.

I once watched a TED video by a guy recounting war tragedies in Afghanistan, and there was one that broke my heart so badly that I turned everything off and just cried. It was horrible. I still think of it from time to time, when I desperately don’t want to. It pops into my mind. I can’t make peace with it. It’s torn my heart in a way that just won’t heal. I can’t un-see it! Do I really need to know the worst horrors that humanity is capable of in order to sympathize with the victims?

indexNow, this idea of guarding what goes into our minds is not shocking for Christians. This is part of our faith. Whatever is pure, whatever is right, whatever is of good report… But we also believe in helping those who need it, and not turning our backs on the suffering. So how do you balance it all?

I don’t have the answers. If I did, I wouldn’t have a loop of that TED video going through my head when I try to sleep at night. I CAN’T balance it all. So I err on the side of protecting my heart and mind. I choose the beautiful and the noble and the right.

And the rest? I give to charities who help. That’s the only solution I can come up with. I put my money where my heart breaks, and I pray.

 

 

A small matter of a few hundred years

01 Sunday Feb 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

christian author, harlequin author, inspirational author, love inspired author, women's ideal body types throughout history

I’m old enough not to subscribe to fashion’s body ideals, but I do recall a time when I’d look down at myself and wonder why I couldn’t be more like so-and-so. So this is for all those young ladies who still try to fit into the ideal…

It’s not worth the effort! In fact, there was a point in history and a geographical location that idealized the exact assets that you’re sporting!

Me? My sweet spot in history is the Italian Renaissance. I would have been hot stuff! πŸ˜‰ If I were interviewed, I’d say, “I just eat when I’m hungry. I don’t know what to say. I roll out of bed looking like this!” Women who were tall and lithe would look at me with envy. How could they achieve my perfect measurements? LOL! And if they’d just wait a few hundred years, they’d get their turn at being “effortless perfection.”

The envy is silly. They ideals are silly. We’re all beautiful and we don’t have to be cookie cutouts!

What about you? When did your body type and fashion ideals collide?

He doesn’t think I’m funny

29 Thursday Jan 2015

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

christian author, clean, harlequin author, inspirational author, love inspired author, married romance, wholesome romance

My husband doesn’t get my humor. Like, at all! I’m a pretty happy, jokey kind of person. When I talk to friends on the phone, there is lots of laughing. I crack jokes and find myself absolutely hilarious. It might come as surprising to you that I married someone who doesn’t find me funny at all!

But he doesn’t. He adores me. He treasures me. But he doesn’t find me funny. He says, “I know other people find you funny.” And he’ll watch me with a bewildered look of happiness on his face while I crack jokes and laugh at them, and he does laugh with me at times, it’s never laughing at the joke.

CandlestickTelephones

My husband has two sides to his personality–goofy and dead solemn. The dead solemn part of his personality is the one I enjoy the most. It’s just so determined and unflappable that I love trying to poke a hole in it.

For example, we’ll be sitting on the couch together and my husband will be reading a book. He sits there, book in front of him, solemn expression on his face. I find him heart-stoppingly handsome, especially when he’s in one of his solemn moods.

Me: Hey, honey?

He lifts his eyes and turns them toward me. No change in expression.

Me: What are you reading?

He says the title, waits for me to have a reaction, then his eyes slowly turn back to his book.

Me: Hey, honey?

His eyes turn slowly toward me again.

Me: Tell me I’m pretty.

Him: You’re gorgeous. And I love you. (Pause.) Okay?

Me: Okay.

His eyes slowly turn back to his book. Still no change in his deadpan expression.

Me: I think you’re gorgeous, too.

Him (still looking at his book): I know.

Me: You know that you’re gorgeous or that I think it?

Him: Both.

Me: Isn’t that vain?

Him: I’m a man. All men think they’re gorgeous. Doesn’t matter how old or unshowered we are, we think we’re gorgeous.

Me: Lucky I agree.

He turns his eyes toward me again.

Him: Am I going to read?

Me: You could. If you really wanted to.

His eyes turn slowly toward his book again, but his hand slides over and takes mine. He tugs me closer.

Me: I mean, if you really, really wanted to read, I wouldn’t stop you or anything.

Him: Let me finish this chapter, and then we can turn in. (Glances at watch.) It’s late.

Me: Kiss me first.

Him: (kisses me, and a glitter of humor comes into his eye) Now, I’m going to read to you aloud until I’m done this chapter.

Me: Heavens, no! You and your depressing books!

He starts to read aloud anyway, because he knows that I hate it and he enjoys teasing me. He follows me around the house while I try to escape his loud reading of some dismal biography. Eventually the book is abandoned, about a paragraph before the end of the chapter.

Him: Honey?

Me: Hmm?

Him: You’re awfully pretty.

It’s the utterly solemn side to his personality that has no ability to understand my humor, and I don’t think I’d trade it for the world.

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Patricia Johns, Author

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