• Author
  • Books
  • Books–Audio
  • Contact

Patricia Johns

~ Bestselling author

Patricia Johns

Tag Archives: keeping up with the Joneses

Peer pressure for women in their 40s

24 Monday Aug 2020

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

Jeb's Wife, keeping up with the Joneses, peer pressure, women in their 40s

I really thought I was done with it in high school. In your teens, you have to find your balance, and you learn that following the crowd is normally a bad idea. I found that when I hit my university years, the pressure was gone. You can be whoever you want, and people at university are perfectly happy to accept you as is. It’s a great experience, and a wonderful place to really find yourself.

In my twenties, I was finding my footing in my career–figuring out what I wanted to do, and how to make a writing career work. I didn’t know any other writers who were doing it for a living, so I had to figure out a lot on my own.

In my thirties, I now had a child at home with me, and I was learning that I didn’t tend to fit in with the regular mom groups anyways. And I was okay with that. I was pursing my writing career, and I didn’t have anyone else who understood what I was trying to do. I pretty much accepted it, and I was the happy odd one out.

And then I hit my forties.

Why is the peer pressure back!? Because it really is! OMG, we all went from taking our own paths to arriving in approximately the same place (a home, kids, spouse, lifestyle) and the pressure to conform and do things like everyone else does is just crushing. Everything from the type of home you’ve chosen, to the type of clothes, to the newness of your vehicle, to the after school activities your kids go to… I don’t understand why that is, but here we are, all over again. The same pressures of adolescence on the shoulders of women in their forties who HAVE adolescents!

I thought I’d matured beyond this!

118155334_2738789686432898_5043758544335309212_n

Enter the pandemic. One of the struggles is that we can’t get together with friends like we used to, but we have learned the fine art of video conferencing. Most of us have, haven’t we? And now, one of my publishers has been hosting some Zoom meetings where can all get together and just chat.

And guess what I found out?

  1. People’s author photos ARE NOT what they look like on a regular Tuesday morning. (Mine included. 😉 )
  2. People’s homes aren’t actually as fancy as they look in those carefully cropped social media posts. Some of us are better at cropping than others, that’s all.
  3. We’re all a whole lot more alike than I’d realized.

And I love that! I love that we’re all just a group of women following our dreams. And our homes aren’t perfect. Our hair is all growing out the gray at various rates, we’re all aging. And you know what? We’re all living our passion– having fun, writing books, editing books in the case of our editors, finding things we enjoy, and loving our families. We’re all throwing ourselves into the thing we love to do–creating amazing books.

So maybe it’s time to relearn that adolescent lesson that we don’t have to be like everyone else. We don’t have to impress anyone, either, because the ones to throw out a snide comment will find something to criticize no matter what you do. We just have to live our lives with passion and heart, and be the best version of ourselves that we can be. That’s it!

And you know what? Brace yourself for the gray, because I’m growing mine out. I’m almost 42. If I can’t own some gray at this point, I don’t know when I can. 😉

****

Hitting the shelves now! 

Do you have your copy yet?

Pub Weekly review

 

It’s hard to compete

28 Thursday Mar 2019

Posted by Patricia Johns in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

harlequin author, heartwarming romance, home, keeping up with the Joneses, Kensington author, love inspired author

I’m a true believer that a home is not a show house.

I’m an apartment person. When I lived in Toronto, I either rented rooms in a large house or lived in an apartment building. When I got married and we moved out to Alberta, we’ve still been drawn to apartment living. It feels natural to me–homey.

2019WMPatriciaJohns-44

You can tell so much about a person by their home. The types of furniture they choose tells their story. The pictures on the walls, the books on their shelves… There is even the end of the couch they like to curl up on–the natural dent that’s left.

Image-47

There are the things they fix around their home and the things they don’t–that knob on a cabinet that just never seems to get replaced versus the gorgeous dishwasher that’s brand new. There’s the stack of bills and junk mail that is almost invisible to them, the worn spots on a kitchen table, the child’s small doodle on a wall that was just too cute to use a Magic Eraser on.

Image-50

Life happens inside a home–and life isn’t spotless and artfully arranged. The tea cups get chipped. The carpet starts to get pressed down in spots. Maybe even the wall colour starts looking a bit dated. But it’s a home that has held memories and love, hope and heartbreak.  I love nothing more than looking around at the beautiful, imperfect, unstaged homes that cradle our lives.

It seems to be human to compete over homes. In the area where I live, people compete over the size of their house. In other places I’ve lived people competed over the part of town they lived in, the type of car in their parking spot. So much competition over things that don’t really matter.

thumbnail_Image-49

Because at the end of the day, our homes aren’t for everyone else to be impressed by. They’re where we come home to, sink into that favourite spot on the couch, and soothe away the day’s stress. For me, my home is where I settle in to write the stories that fill my head, where we raise our child to be a good and honest young man, where we curl up together and love each other as best we know how.

You can’t compete over that.

What do you love most about your home?

 

****

Have you read my March release yet?

4.282079.512.9781335510570He’s always been the one…

She’s always been just a friend!

Grace Beverly spent years hopelessly in love with her best friend, Billy Austin. Now he’s back in Eagle’s Rest, Colorado, determined to provide the best life possible for his four-year-old daughter. He’s just not sure how. Helping Billy navigate the world of parenting is a one-way ticket back to heartache. Yet how can Grace say no to her oldest friend?

Harlequin

Amazon

Patricia Johns, Author

Patricia Johns, Author

Goodreads

Enter your email address to follow this blog and never miss a post!

Join 235 other followers

Create a website or blog at WordPress.com

Cancel
Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy